Live and let live …
It’s an Al-anon slogan – and one I’ve worked particularly hard at embracing.
Compassion fatigue is something that I struggle with still to this day. It isn’t just about my past loved one struggling with addiction now though, it can be the person in the grocery store who is shopping the clearance only section with an almost empty cart. It can be the single mom who has lost her housing and is doing what none of ever dream of doing, asking for help on social media to feed her child, while she awaits her housing options.
There is no shame in this, I truly don’t know how many people can afford the time we live in now. Sure, it’s not prolonged exposure for me in the same sense anymore. I’m not living in addiction, I’m not back where I once was, wondering how I was going to feed my children and keep a roof over their heads, while also begging and pleading for someone to see what it was doing to all of us, and especially them.
But I do remember those days, and I remember them so well that it takes me seconds to return to that place and hours to shake the feeling of helplessness I have for others now. Hours to return to the place where I can live and let live …
I don’t want to get back to my own place of recovery because I don’t care, because trust me I care, more than I can ever even communicate verbally but I have learned that if I don’t continue to focus on my own recovery and stay in my own lane that it can all unravel so quickly.
Al- Anon is such a controversial program – but a program that truly saved me and continues to save me to this day.
I can send a little money to the mom who needs help (even if I don’t really have it to give) or I can randomly offer to give someone in the grocery store the $20 from my wallet. Will it make a huge difference in their life? No. Absolutely not, and I wish I could do more but I do hope that it can give them just that little bit of hope that I once needed. A small reminder that this too shall pass someday. A reason to keep going.
I’m speaking to you right now.. you are not alone and there will be a day that this is a memory for you like it is for me.
You are loved. And you are enough.
~ A
She is Found 